


Say My Name

by delphoxdork



Series: Relationships Are Complicated [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Other, Reader Insert, Slash, a lil angst then coot, gender neutral reader, or at least it could be if u want it to be, this is an idea i've had for a while so here we gooooo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-22
Updated: 2016-12-22
Packaged: 2018-09-11 01:03:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 4,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8947000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delphoxdork/pseuds/delphoxdork
Summary: You and Spencer Reid have been dating for a few months now, but no one else from the BAU has caught on yet. Why? Because why should they? It’s none of their business, or at least that’s how you view it. Is it possible Spencer thinks a little differently?





	1. The Incident

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in comic sans because I hate myself.

This case was certainly a stressful one alright. It had you up half the night just thinking about it. You were a little bit sad that Spencer hadn’t spent the previous night at your place like he usually did. You had hoped he would have helped you take your mind off of everything, but maybe not even then. Not only the two of you, but the whole team was pretty shaken up by this case. Maybe it was for the better that Spencer didn’t come over… it would have only made things worse if all there was was both of your worries to build off of.

You resisted the urge to glance over at him, you were all in the middle of a meeting, going over the details of the case for what seemed like the millionth time. That was reason enough not to ogle your  _ boyfriend _ in the middle of work. When the two of you were alone, you could never get enough of him. The same was true now… you were just good at repressing it. You weren’t very close with any of your coworkers other than Spencer, but you didn’t think the fact that you were the ‘newest’ member of the BAU had anything to do with that. You just preferred to keep your work and private life separate. 

That philosophy got a little messy when you had begun dating Spencer. But you couldn’t help yourself. He was too irresistible, and by nothing short of a miracle, he was at least somewhat interested in you too, or that’s how you saw it anyway. But just because you guys were a  _ thing _ didn’t mean your coworkers had to know. So you saved all of your urges to stare at your boyfriend for after work. Then you could look at his pretty face as much as you wanted. 

You were snapped back to reality when a suggestion was tossed out, brought up by none other than the man of your affections. You nodded as you listened, switching into full work mode now. The idea seemed legitimate, totally plausible. You were a little surprised no one had thought of it before.

“I agree with Reid,” you pitched in after he finished before elaborating on his idea a little more with your own newly formed thoughts. You had been so wrapped up in what you were saying to notice the minuscule, well-hidden look of rejection on Spencer’s face. It got swept away as a brainstorm of ideas began to be shared across the meeting room table. You all were going to be leaving for a case tomorrow, so this was a good thing. You felt like some sort of progress was finally being made.


	2. A Nice Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added an extra chapter early bc I'm nice. Or maybe it's all just bad and it doesn't matter either way lolololol

After a long day of work, you were finally glad to be going home. Tomorrow you’d be going out again, travelling halfway across the country, so you were going to enjoy it while it lasted. Spencer was still there when you left, working on something or another at his desk. He had always been an extreme workaholic, even more so than you, ever since you met him. When you got to your car, you pulled out your phone, bringing up your conversation

//Come to mine when ur done?

You typed. You waited for a response, as usually you didn’t have to do so for more than a minute. This time he took a couple of minutes, which was odd, but you figured it was because he was still wrapped up in work. You brushed off the feeling. 

//Okay

You nodded to yourself upon seeing his text and threw your phone on the passenger seat of your car before pulling out of the lot. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too long, you were hungry and planned on making a decent supper tonight, probably starting it right when you got home. 

When you actually got to your apartment, you shivered. It was late fall and you were pretty sure your heater wasn’t working or you had a window that wasn’t sealed properly. You knew you had to talk to your landlord at some point about it, you just hadn’t gotten around to it. So you took off your work clothes, changing into something more comfortable, making sure to dress in layers. Then you started dinner. You were thinking something pasta-y, so you got some water boiling. 

Buttered noodles, spaghetti, and beef stroganoff were the extent of your pasta making talents, so you decided on the last of the three, thinking that, in that moment, it would taste the best. Just before you had finished making it, you heard a knock on the door, a pause, and then the door knob turning. 

“Hey babe,” you called from the kitchen, knowing it was Spencer. Not a moment later was the tall guy walking into your kitchen. 

“I locked your door- you know you really shouldn’t leave it unlocked,” he chastised you. Something seemed a little bit off, but it was probably just hunger. You weren’t sure if it was yours or his, or both, but that was what you were blaming it on. 

“Yes I know, you’ve told me before. I only do it when you’re coming over so I don’t have to let you in,” you told him, glancing over your shoulder, giving him a cheeky grin. “Or maybe I could just get you your own key,” you said, waiting to do so until you turned back around so you didn’t have to meet his eyes when you said this. You were sure you had blushed, at least a little. You guys hadn’t really talked about this at all, but you had definitely thought about it. Maybe a little too much. Or a lot too much. 

“Now there’s a thought,” he said, a hint of playfulness in his tone. 

“You came just in time- soups on,” you told him as you dished out your culinary masterpiece, changing the subject. 

“That’s not soup.”

“Oh, thanks for that, I didn’t realize, Mr. Literal,” you grinned at him as you put some of the dishes in the sink before bringing the plates to your small dining room table. If it could be called that. It wasn’t even in a dining room, just an awkward space between the living room and kitchen as they were combined into one. It worked though, and that was all that really mattered. 

When you were both sitting down eating, you held your tongue, tempted to talk about work but knowing that it was really better to just not. Instead, you gave in to your earlier temptation now that you were free to do so. You let your eyes wander over Spencer’s features, taking everything in. Damn, how did you ever become so lucky as to find someone like him? Among everything that you saw, you noticed a slight furrowing in his downward tilted face, a minute tightness of the lips. 

“Something up?” You asked him, taking a bite of your beef stroganoff. He moved his eyes to look up at you, though he had trouble maintaining eye contact, his lips down-turning ever so slightly.

“Nothing,” he replied, shaking his head a little.


	3. What's his name?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once I've written something I really don't like keeping it to myself, or so I've learned

“Mmm, something tells me I shouldn’t believe that answer.” You were getting pretty good at reading his microexpressions, which was really coming in handy honestly. When the two of you first started dating, it was very difficult to tell what was on his mind, even despite you being a professional profiler. 

“I just… I don’t know. Really, it’s nothing,” he insisted.

“If it’s enough to make you even slightly resemble a sad puppy dog I highly doubt it’s nothing.” He was silent for a moment as he stared back down at his food. 

“It’s just…” he started similarly to the last time he spoke. “You called me Reid today.” So that was what this was about? Your eyebrows furrowed a bit in confusion. That’s what you had always called him when the two of you were at work.

“That’s what I always call you when we’re at work,” you relayed your thoughts.

“Not… not since we started going out,” he was repeating things a lot. He obviously wasn’t totally comfortable talking about this. But either way, you had called him Reid before after the two of you started dating, or at least, you were pretty sure. That was what you had always called him at work before, so why would that change? You didn’t want to tip off your coworkers to anything going on between the two of you. 

“Oh, I didn’t realize it bothered you… I can stop, if you want,” you said, wanting to appease him but you were pretty positive that the confusion was written all over your face. 

“I guess I just don’t understand why we have to pretend like none of this exists while we’re at work,” he said, his voice incredibly small, his shoulders scrunched forward as if trying to diminish his frame as well. You sat there for a moment, staring at a point on the table, a little surprised and unsure of what to say. You had thought that Spencer was in agreement, that keeping your relationship personal was the best option. He had never done anything previously to contradict otherwise. 

“I never pretended anything,” you said finally, looking at his face. He glanced up at you when you said this. “Sure, I keep things at a professional level, but that’s because it’s work.” You didn’t want to sound overly defensive, but the look on Spencer’s face… it was almost as if you were hurting him. Hurting him this whole time and hadn’t even been aware of it. Now that you couldn’t deal with.

“Professional? That’s what you’d call it?” He asked you, seeming to find his voice some. You stared at him in disbelief. 

“Yes, that is what I’d call it. I mean, seriously, what would you have me do? Have a nice steamy make out session across our desks just to show the whole office how crazy I am about you?” You asked him, your own voice rising a little. A hint of color made it to Spencer’s face, but he still appeared defiant. 

“No- of course not! All I’m saying is, is it really that hard, I mean, do you even know my first name?” He asked you accusingly and it made you pull your head back. Did you even- of course you knew his first name! What the actual hell. 

“Yeah, Spencer, I know your freaking name,” you said, throwing it at him to show him that you did in fact know it. You knew you were probably taking things too far and should stop, rein yourself in, but you couldn’t stop yourself, or the words coming out of your mouth for that matter. 

“Wow, I’m pretty sure that’s the first time you’ve ever said it. Between calling me by my last name at work and all the pet names outside, I was beginning to wonder.” Wait- did he not like you calling him things like babe and handsome? Because if so this was the first time you were hearing about it.

“Well if you didn’t like it when I call you things you should’ve told me,” you said, sounding resigned, just wanting this whole conversation to just be over and done with already. 

“That’s not what I meant I-”

“Well that’s what it sounded like,” you interrupted.


	4. I Like You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I gonna finish this tonight? probably.

“All I want is to be able to show a little affection at work. And to let our coworkers know. I’m not asking for a lot.” Spencer argued, now meeting your eyes.

“What business is it of theirs that we’re together?” You asked, waiting for an answer. 

“They’re my  _ friends. _ And I know they’re not yours, but I think you’d really like them if you actually gave them a chance.” You looked at him incredulously.

“What’s that supposed to mean? I didn’t know it was such a bad thing to keep my work and personal life separate.”

“So what happened with me then?” He asked after a moment, jaw set as he looked at you.

“What?"

“If you like to keep those two aspects of your life separate, why are you even dating me?” Your eyes snapped up to meet his as soon as the words were out of his mouth. They sounded an awful lot like ‘why are we even dating,’ which sound way too similar to ‘we should stop dating,’ which was the last thing you ever wanted to do, if you were telling the truth. 

“Because I  _ like  _ you,” you replied with your most honest answer. “I still prefer to keep those areas of my life detached from one another, but I’m more than willing to bend the rules even just a little bit just to be with you,  _ Spencer.” _ You really couldn’t believe you had never called him by his name before. You were sure he had to have missed it, which was why you made sure to emphasize his name when you used it now. 

He sat there for a moment, holding eye contact, before looking down, somewhere off to the side. “I- I’m sorry,” he mumbled, seeming sincere. “I guess I’ve been feeling a little insecure lately.” He admitted, arms loosely wrapped around himself.


	5. I Like You Too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nearly done.

You sighed quietly.

“No ba-Spencer,  _ I’m  _ sorry,” you insisted, making sure to catch yourself when almost calling him ‘babe’. You didn’t want to do it if he didn’t like it. “I didn’t even think about how it would have made you feel, and that’s my bad.” You really weren’t good at speaking about anything emotional, but you knew this was important. “And here I thought I was getting good at telling what’s on your mind,” you tacked on at the end quietly, letting out a little huff of air

You both sat there for a moment, him looking down, and you wanting to also drop your gaze from his face but you wanted to try and gauge any sort of emotion coming from him. You wouldn’t call it  _ profiling _ him, per say, as you hated even the thought of him or any of your coworkers doing that to you, you just called it being a concerned partner. 

“You know, I actually do like it when you call me babe,” he told you softly, a blush forming on his cheeks as his eyes finally lifted to meet yours. Your shoulders slumped, relaxing a little bit as you gave him a small smile before standing up. You walked around the table and held out your hand to him. He looked at it, then up at you, before reaching out to take it, standing up when you tugged. 

You lead him the few feet it took to be in the living room, considering that everything was pretty connected, and laid down on the couch. You scooted over so there was room for him to lay beside you. “C’mon babe,” you patted the space between you and the couch. He managed a small smile before crawling over you and settling into the spot you had made for him. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders as he wrapped his around your waist and laid a head on your shoulder. This was something the two of you liked to do a lot, just relax on the couch together, talking about nothing and everything. 

You both just sat there for a while, enjoying the feeling of just holding each other. You had began running your fingers through his hair and he nestled into you a little more. “I like you too, by the way,” he mumbled into your shirt. You smiled as you kissed the top of his head, unable to stop yourself from thinking how lucky you were for what seemed like the hundredth time. 


	6. Tentative Steps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so close to bein done, I'm excited. I mean, seeing as how I'm posting this pretty rapid fire, I have no idea how I'm doing because I have no feedback, but ahhh well. At least I'm enjoying this story.

Work was hectic. You had all flown out to Wisconsin yesterday and already there had been two more victims. The entire team was on high alert and working as fast as they could in order to catch this UnSub before he made another move. At the rate you were going though, that prospect was looking more and more bleak. 

It took you all a week to wrap up the case. It had been too long. Too many were dead in the time it took you all to solve it. If only you had worked faster, harder, more, you couldn’t help but think. On the plane ride home most of you were silent. You sat next to Spencer, who was currently staring off into space, seemingly thinking intently about something. You were sure you knew exactly what it was. 

“You doing OK?” you asked him, glancing over. He looked back over at you, a hint of surprise flitting across his face. You usually didn’t talk much to him, or anyone at work for that matter, about much else other than work. He shrugged in response. 

“I’m dealing,” he replied. “How are you?”

“Overthinking everything. But what else is new?” You let out a small humorless laugh. You both sat there in silence for the rest of the way back, but it was still nice, to just sit next to him. A small comfort in this crappy situation. You noticed a few of your coworkers giving you an odd glance here and there when you had initially sat next to Spencer, but you just ignored them. Oddly enough, you didn’t find it anywhere near as hard as you thought you would. 


	7. Pushing Boundaries

When you all got back, it took a little bit for things to return to normal. But like after every tough case, things eventually did. They had to, or no one in the BAU would ever survive. For about a week or two, everything was pretty quiet. Mostly, you all just filled out paperwork or consulted a few minor cases from the comforts of your respective desks.

“Mornin’ Spencer,” you greeted, stopping him as he walked past your desk one morning. He froze behind you as you used his name, and you saw Morgan look up from what he was doing to give you a weird look. You paid him no mind though. 

“Uh, good morning Y/N,” he replied, smiling at you when you looked back at him. It was small, but it seemed like he was happy that you had called him Spencer at work. The thing was, you had been planning to do that for a few days at this point… or weeks. Or really, ever since you had that talk at your apartment. It just took you a while. It was new territory, the unfamiliar ground between business and personal. But you figured if that was where Spencer was, you were willing to go there.

And when there were no repercussions from your little test step that morning other than making your boyfriend happy, you decided to keep pushing that line, ever so slightly. That afternoon you purposely sat next him, which usually you didn’t do, you just had always sat in the same seat you always did. Again, he looked surprised, but pleasantly so. At this point, all you wanted to do was find more ways to bring that look to his face. He was so handsome, it was unfair. You were helpless when it came to him. 


	8. The Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two more chapters bitchesssss

This continued on for the next month or so. You’d let yourself stand closer to him, sit next to him, brush his hand with yours, and above all, say his name when at work. You saved the endearments for when you were alone still, along with every other aspect of your relationship, but you had to admit that what you guys had going on now was pretty nice. You hadn’t talked about the changes you were making, but you were more than fine with that. 

“You almost done?” You asked Spencer as you turned of your computer and packed up for the day. You had begun carpooling too, seeing as how he was spending the night nearly  _ every _ night, it only made sense. Today you drove.

“Yeah, go ahead to the car, I’ll be out in a sec,” he said, not looking up from what he was working on. That was your little workaholic for you. A small smile made it onto your lips as you donned your work bag and left the office. A few people had left already, but there were still some stragglers left too. You were giddy to leave though, you had a little something special planned, seeing as it was your and Spencer’s six month anniversary. 

“Y/L/N,” you heard someone call for you just as you were leaving the building. Turning around, you saw that it was Morgan. Your eyes furrowed in confusion as you looked up at him. He was standing at the top of the few steps you had just walked down to get to the parking lot. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” He asked, taking a step or two down.

“Uh.. sure,” you replied, keeping your guard up. It wasn’t usual that he would approach you, in fact, he probably liked you least out of all of your coworkers. It never really bothered you, but now you just wanted to know what he wanted  _now._


	9. Happy Six Months

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so close to the ending, can you taste it?

“You’ve been acting pretty strange lately, Y/N/L,” Morgan commented. Where was he going with this, you couldn’t help but wonder. He waited for you to defend yourself, but all you did was raise an eyebrow, beckoning for him to continue. 

“Have you been trying to come on to Reid?” He asked, looking down at you, very seriously. Now both of your eyebrows were raised. You could definitely tell that Morgan was protective of and loyal to his friends, but this?  _ Really? _

“I- well, I mean-” you sputtered a bit, taken aback by this confrontation, but you were interrupted. 

“Because it definitely seems like you like him an awful lot, a lot more than as just a co-worker would.”

You were about to create some defense or excuse for your recent behavior, but then you saw Spencer walking down the stairs through the glass door, and threw all that out the window.

_ Happy six months, babe.  _

“Well, I better like him an awful lot,” you replied, as if it was obvious, doing so just as Spencer opened the door. Morgan stared down at you, looking confused as all hell. “We’ve only been dating for the past six months.” The agent’s eyes went wide, but you looked past him to the brown eyed hottie standing there behind him, looking just as surprised. 

“Hey, babe. Ready to go?” You asked, grinning up at him. Technically, you were both done with work, so you weren’t really breaking any of your boundary rules. This is when Morgan turned to look behind him, seeing Spencer standing there, looking for any sort of rebuttal from him. 

“Yeah, I am,” he said, looking like he was trying to repress a smile of his own. “See you tomorrow, Morgan.” After sparing only a glance at the man, Spencer looked back down at you as he descended the steps and you held out your hand for him to take. He did so without hesitation.


	10. Sappy Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Doneeeee! whoo hoo. I've got an idea for a continuation of this (hint hint: how things go over at work now that they're a thing, and maybe the special surprise the reader has for reid ;))))))))) ) so if you'd be interested in reading this leave me a comment and maybe I'll write it.

Neither of you say anything to each other until you’re in the safety of your car. You pulled your door shut, but didn’t move to start the engine just yet. Spencer turned to face you as best he could while sitting in the car. 

“What was that all about?” He asked, eyebrows furrowed but still, there was this look on his face. You could tell you said the right thing. 10 points to Y/N. 

“I guess Morgan caught on to us,” you shrugged. “He asked me if I liked you and I answered honestly.” Without any warning, he leaned forward, catching your lips with his, cupping your jaw with a gentle yet needy hand. You leaned into the kiss enthusiastically, sighing at the contact. Now that you allowed yourself to be closer to Spencer at work, you found yourself craving his touch even more than before, if that was even possible. 

When you pulled away, you only did so for air, and to say something. 

“Actually, I lied,” you said, out of breath.

“What?” Your boyfriend asked, confused once again. You resisted the urge to answer the question later and instead just go back to his kiss swollen lips. Just barely.

“I  _ lied _ ,” you repeated. “I-I don’t just like you, Spencer.” You were nervous, you could feel your palms sweating, one hand still resting on his waist and the other in your lap. He had an unreadable expression on his face, which didn’t help the situation. Your fear of rejection reared its ugly head, but you knew you had to do this.

“I love you, Spencer Reid,” you said, it taking everything in you just to maintain eye contact. He definitely seemed surprised, but you couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad surprise. You had already determined that you loved him, probably at least a month ago, but you really hadn’t expected to say something right now, not like this. But it just felt right. His silence made you begin to doubt yourself though.

He finally moved, letting out a huff of air, a slow smile growing on his face. You allowed yourself to let go of your doubt at the sight of that smile.

“I love  _ you _ ,” he said, still sounding breathless although you knew it wasn’t from the kiss. You let out a laugh at his silliness and because you were just so  _ happy _ . You smiled back at him, leaning in for another kiss. You had no doubts now that mixing your personal and professional life was the best decision you ever made.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy, more parts to come, some are already written so you don't have to worry about waiting a million years.


End file.
